It is with
much delight and passion that I look forward to writing early in the morning. I
have decided that I wanted to develop my writing skills and abilities and to do
that I need to set aside a specific time to write consistently each morning. I
entered the ‘My 500 Words' in 31 Days challenge by Jeff Goins. I look forward to
this time like many people look forward to a night of rest. God forgive me for
taking so long, for leaning upon my own understanding. For years I have
struggled with staying focused to write consistently. I would allow all types
of seeming reasonable excuses to distract me from staying on track throughout
the days, which turned into months and those months, eventually turned into
years. Years of regret, years of wishing I had stayed focus on my writing
career. I would always start, oh yes I could get started in a heart beat,
although to finish on my own, well that’s the reason I have struggled all these
years on my own.
I began
writing in diaries that my mother gave me as a child. I don’t know if it was
more of the “ right thing to do” or if she recognized something in me, because
she continued to give me diaries and ensured that books were always readily
available. As a child I used to find each of the fairy tales and other stories,
which were embedded deep in “The Book of Knowledge” encyclopedia twenty-piece
set we had at home. I can remember the day that the "Grolier Dandelion Library Book Set" was delivered to our home.
” series
were delivered to our home. A Raggedy Ann doll was included and she had a
zipper located on her back, allowing for the storage of books, pajamas or what
item may have intrigued a little girl at that age. My love for writing was
further fueled when I begged my parents for a typewriter for Christmas and they
told me that they couldn’t afford it and to my dismay on Christmas morning,
there was no typewriter under the tree. My parents guided me to the dining room
table where sat my first blue IBM typewriter! I screamed for joy as I ran over
to the typewriter reassuring myself that it was really real as I press the
buttons and turned the knobs, surely I was the happiest person in the world
that day.
As a freshmen, in high school, I remembered
entering a writing contest. I was proud of my first story called ‘The Bus‘ it
was like a ‘Twilight Zone’ story, I knew that they would select my story as a
winner. I don’t know what became of it, since I didn’t win. I allowed that to
discourage me from continuing to write publicly. My English teachers would
allow the classmates to correct each other’s homework. Many times the comments
on my paper were that I didn’t follow directions. I never understood how I
didn’t follow the teachers instructions which only further added to my
confusion and lack of confidence in my writing. When I attended my first college
English class, I asked the instructor a question, his respond was “You should
have learned that in High School!” I was too embarrassed to ask any more
questions. Again, I allowed all of these negative events to continue fuel my
lack of confidence in my writing ability. I hid my desire for writing instead
of using the passion and fire inside of me to guide me to more appealing
circumstances and people. As the years past and I started a family, the
computer replaced my typewriter and I was able to write my thoughts down
quicker and with less stress on my hand. I would find myself writing short
stories here and there. I would take all of the creative writing classes
available while attending in college.
A few years
ago I started blogging. “Communicating Joy” is my main blog about the
relationships between God and people. I have one called the “Five Joys, which I
wanted to be about my life with raising my five children. I did do another blog,
which I deleted because the information was too controversial. I have also
started blogging about my cycling, although I think I need to create a separate
blog for cycling, because my adventures in cycling are not the same as the
relationships with God and raising my children is a completely different theme
than the other two. So, I do have something to write about, my goal is to
remain consistent, to become well known and sought after as a writer or even
and editor. I want to live the life of a writer, to be free to write after a
nice morning ride. To be mentally invigorated with the challenge to complete writing
assignments with themes, research and deadlines. That is the life that I truly
want to live. And it’s up to me to create it. Although, one thing I have not incorporated
in my writing passion, is consistent prayer. I’ve tried to do this on my own.
The difference is now I’m praying and asking God to help me to complete these
goals, which are burning in my heart to come out. No more will I attempt to do
this on my own. Constantly relying one of my favorite scriptures “Trust in the
Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5 KJV (Paraphrased) Prayer, prayer, prayer, and more prayer makes the difference.
So today, I
am here, today I have written more than any other day.
Today I am
truly enjoying my writing. At the end of the 31 days, I must find another
project to challenge me to continue writing, for it is truly one of my heartfelt
passions that had never died.
